I am the last person on earth that I thought would ever be a children’s advocate of any kind, however, there is a serious issue terrorizing this country’s kids. Soccer Dads.
I live next door to a community park. The good news is that the west side of the house has large windows facing the Red Rocks mountains. Unfortunately, my immediate view is a little league soccer field. On Saturday mornings, you see a blur of youths dressed in uniforms of primary colors kicking a fat white ball around on the grass. There’s always a wall of parents protecting their children, cheering them on. At least, that’s how things appear at first glance.
This morning I decided to go for a jog around the park. It’s sunny today, and the kind of winter weather we all moved to Vegas for (unlike the past 2 months which has been the kind of winter weather people on the East Coast try to escape). As I neared one of the ongoing soccer games, I noticed a line of dads watching their little boys play. These kids are no larger than my cats, and when they ran on their tiny little legs, they looked cute, like midgets running wild. I was feeling good about myself, here I am, Saturday morning, out of bed, jogging, burning calories, doing fine things for my heart and building bone mass by exercising, I was thinking, “this is a good day.” But then I stopped dead in my tracks when I heard something that should only be heard behind closed doors and after downing a fifth of Jack Daniels. One of the dads yelled at a kid, who evidently screwed up. “YOU LITTLE SON-OF-A-BITCH! YOU'RE USELESS!”
I’m not a parent and I’m not even into sports. I think it’s okay if I am watching Fox News (as if I would do that!) and suddenly blurt out, after seeing an image of W on TV, “G@#d!)*m *$@r.” That’s one thing. Calling your kid useless in front of his team and everyone’s parents is another.
I used to go to the Ole Miss Rebel games with my own father and can honestly say he threw the F word at players a time or ten thousand. But, I’m relieved to say, he never called me “useless” or “a little bitch.” I think the worst thing he ever said to me was, “Can’t you do better than a D in math?” And when I made a C the next semester, he actually told me he was proud of me. Yeah, I didn’t do so hot in math.
I can’t single out this one hot-headed dad, because right when I was working up a personal rage against him, another kid did something wrong and another dad threw his hands into the air and YELLED AT THE TOP OF HIS LUNGS, “OH MY GOD! WHAT IN THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?”
Jesus H. Christ. These boys are going to grow up to love Mommy more than Daddy. Although I didn’t see any mommies react to the daddies' outburst. They sat in low lawn chairs and talked to each other, laughing about something mundane like the way the guys get so worked up at the kids over this silly game.
It wasn’t just those two dads who lost it. It was every dad standing in this line. Obviously, this was where the losing team’s fathers hung out, because they were all very unhappy with their kids. In the course of a few minutes, each father had a fit over something his kid did. Of course, here’s a bad thought, maybe it wasn’t their own kid they were having a fit over, but someone else’s. That means that the kids’ fathers didn’t come to their defense. Perhaps they thought the verbal beating was justified.
Behind every bad child is a lousy parent. I don’t know how these kids act in public or at home, but I do believe they are going to be in some serious need of therapy pretty soon, if not right now. Forget the after-game pizza. Get those boys a nice Jewish shrink.
The game is over. The parents and kids have gone home. The day is still beautiful. My cat, Sammy Davis, Jr. sleeps next to the fireplace, one paw covers his eyes to block the sun streaming in through the window. Earlier, I fed him too much and he threw up on my favorite throw blanket. “Bad boy,” I scolded him, but I didn’t have any venom in me. I fed him too much. He threw up. That’s what I get. I’m a parent in a way. This cat depends on me for everything except fur balls. I bet I love him more than most parents love their kids, at least more than those soccer dads love their kids. I can only hope that those boys get the chance to one day stop kicking soccer balls, and instead get the opportunity to kick their daddies in the balls. Both parties deserve it.
February 26, 2005
February 24, 2005
Guckert Gate? What Guckert Gate?
Who am I kidding? I can't leave Gannon/Guckert alone.
Here's a story from Salon.com on the way the mainstream media is ignoring a scandal that dwarfs anything Clinton could have ever done.
From Eric Boehlert in Salon:
Gannon
Ordinarily, revelations that a former male prostitute, using an alias (Jeff Gannon) and working for a phony news organization, was ushered into the White House -- without undergoing a full-blown security background check -- in order to pose softball questions to administration officials would qualify as news by any recent Beltway standard. Yet as of Thursday, ABC News, which produces "Good Morning America," "World News Tonight With Peter Jennings," "Nightline," "This Week," "20/20" and "Primetime Live," has not reported one word about the three-week-running scandal. Neither has CBS News ("The Early Show," "The CBS Evening News," "60 Minutes," "60 Minutes Wednesday" and "Face the Nation"). NBC and its entire family of morning, evening and weekend news programs have addressed the story only three times....
Meanwhile on the newsstands, through Thursday, there had been no meaningful coverage in USA Today or in the Los Angeles Times, Miami Herald, St. Louis Post-Dispatch, Detroit Free Press, Cleveland Plain Dealer, San Francisco Chronicle, Indianapolis Star, Denver Post, Oakland Tribune and Philadelphia Inquirer, to name a few that have effectively boycotted the White House press office scandal....
As for the editorial pages, it's curious that the nation's five largest papers, all pillars of the media establishment (the New York Times, the Washington Post, the Los Angeles Times, the Wall Street Journal and USA Today), have been silent on the Guckert saga -- especially when dailies in more out-of-the-way places such as Tulsa, Okla.; Bangor, Maine; Niagara Falls, N.Y.; Augusta County, Va.; and Pensacola, Fla., have all deemed the story troubling enough to require attention, as noted by Media Matters for America, a liberal advocacy group that first raised questions about Guckert and Talon News
Here's a story from Salon.com on the way the mainstream media is ignoring a scandal that dwarfs anything Clinton could have ever done.
From Eric Boehlert in Salon:
Gannon
Ordinarily, revelations that a former male prostitute, using an alias (Jeff Gannon) and working for a phony news organization, was ushered into the White House -- without undergoing a full-blown security background check -- in order to pose softball questions to administration officials would qualify as news by any recent Beltway standard. Yet as of Thursday, ABC News, which produces "Good Morning America," "World News Tonight With Peter Jennings," "Nightline," "This Week," "20/20" and "Primetime Live," has not reported one word about the three-week-running scandal. Neither has CBS News ("The Early Show," "The CBS Evening News," "60 Minutes," "60 Minutes Wednesday" and "Face the Nation"). NBC and its entire family of morning, evening and weekend news programs have addressed the story only three times....
Meanwhile on the newsstands, through Thursday, there had been no meaningful coverage in USA Today or in the Los Angeles Times, Miami Herald, St. Louis Post-Dispatch, Detroit Free Press, Cleveland Plain Dealer, San Francisco Chronicle, Indianapolis Star, Denver Post, Oakland Tribune and Philadelphia Inquirer, to name a few that have effectively boycotted the White House press office scandal....
As for the editorial pages, it's curious that the nation's five largest papers, all pillars of the media establishment (the New York Times, the Washington Post, the Los Angeles Times, the Wall Street Journal and USA Today), have been silent on the Guckert saga -- especially when dailies in more out-of-the-way places such as Tulsa, Okla.; Bangor, Maine; Niagara Falls, N.Y.; Augusta County, Va.; and Pensacola, Fla., have all deemed the story troubling enough to require attention, as noted by Media Matters for America, a liberal advocacy group that first raised questions about Guckert and Talon News
I want my Rummy TV
Now that Guckert Gate has blown up in the Bush administration’s face, it’s time to turn our attention to the next big thing: The Pentagon Channel, a 24/7 Department of Defense-brewed network, and affectionately known as Rummy TV. A number of cable systems, including Time Warner, already carry the Pentagon Channel, and now the Dish Network will soon begin beaming the station to its more than 11 million viewers right alongside the half-dozen porn channels the satellite corporation offers. Forget war and peace, we have war and porn.
Special shows include “Queer Factor,” a half-hour reality show where Donald Rumsfeld forces liberal democrats to denounce the right to choose, listen to Toby Keith, and openly discuss their personal relationship with Jesus.
Rummy TV is covered quite nicely by Arianna Huffington in her column yesterday (yes, Lablogda is always a day behind. I have a damn life so get over it).
Special shows include “Queer Factor,” a half-hour reality show where Donald Rumsfeld forces liberal democrats to denounce the right to choose, listen to Toby Keith, and openly discuss their personal relationship with Jesus.
Rummy TV is covered quite nicely by Arianna Huffington in her column yesterday (yes, Lablogda is always a day behind. I have a damn life so get over it).
February 22, 2005
Fear and loathing without you
Dear Mr. Thompson,
I guess it’s silly to write a letter to someone who is already deceased, but if there is a blogosphere wherever you are, maybe you’ll read this. I’m one of those people who has caused searches on your name to jump over 1,330% since your death this weekend. I just wanted to let you know, as so many others have, that you made an impact on my youth. My parents would probably say that you corrupted me, but I just want to say thanks for showing me a good time.
When I read Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas for the first time, a highway in my brain opened up. I was a teenager in Mississippi (of all places) and to say that I was bored is like saying W has problems pronouncing big words. You were one reason I started going from wishing I could Get Out, to actually plotting my eventual escape.
In college, I picked boyfriends based on whether or not they had read your work. In fact, I remember sitting in a bar one night and falling in love for a few weeks with some guy who had curly blond hair and Roger Daltrey eyes. I can’t remember his name, but I do remember that he claimed he had met you once. I remember touching his arm with a finger, as if I by touching him made me a part of your inner circle. Ironically, I’m just the type of person you would have made fun of.
It wasn’t so much how you wrote (although you came up with some great lines, like “I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me.”) but the way you wrote about a life more jaded than a Buddhist statue. You also once said that when the going gets weird, the weird turn pro. With that one line, you probably inspired untold amount of writers. There will never be another you, but hopefully, some of us can have moments where we are as wonderfully weird and free. Wherever you are, I hope you are having a good time.
I guess it’s silly to write a letter to someone who is already deceased, but if there is a blogosphere wherever you are, maybe you’ll read this. I’m one of those people who has caused searches on your name to jump over 1,330% since your death this weekend. I just wanted to let you know, as so many others have, that you made an impact on my youth. My parents would probably say that you corrupted me, but I just want to say thanks for showing me a good time.
When I read Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas for the first time, a highway in my brain opened up. I was a teenager in Mississippi (of all places) and to say that I was bored is like saying W has problems pronouncing big words. You were one reason I started going from wishing I could Get Out, to actually plotting my eventual escape.
In college, I picked boyfriends based on whether or not they had read your work. In fact, I remember sitting in a bar one night and falling in love for a few weeks with some guy who had curly blond hair and Roger Daltrey eyes. I can’t remember his name, but I do remember that he claimed he had met you once. I remember touching his arm with a finger, as if I by touching him made me a part of your inner circle. Ironically, I’m just the type of person you would have made fun of.
It wasn’t so much how you wrote (although you came up with some great lines, like “I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me.”) but the way you wrote about a life more jaded than a Buddhist statue. You also once said that when the going gets weird, the weird turn pro. With that one line, you probably inspired untold amount of writers. There will never be another you, but hopefully, some of us can have moments where we are as wonderfully weird and free. Wherever you are, I hope you are having a good time.
February 19, 2005
Even the Christian Science Monitor is Mad about Guck
Even Christian Science Monitor is appalled by the Guckert/Gannon scandal. Good God Almighty, why isn't Fox News making a stink out of this. Oh I know, those crazy liberals, making a mountain out of a ho-hill. (that is not a misspelling, by the way)
Cmonitor
Cmonitor
February 17, 2005
More on W's favorite faux journalist
When someone says something better than you ever could, why mess with perfection? Maureen Dowd, in a NY Times article (which Betsy posted in the comments to the previous post) talks more about the Guckert/Gannon thing. Cutting to the chase, here's what she says that hits the nail on the head:.)
"At last month's press conference, Jeff Gannon asked Mr. Bush how he could work with Democrats "who seem to have divorced themselves from reality." But Bush officials have divorced themselves from reality.
They flipped TV's in the West Wing and Air Force One to Fox News. They paid conservative columnists handsomely to promote administration programs. Federal agencies distributed packaged "news" video releases with faux anchors so local news outlets would run them. As CNN reported, the Pentagon produces Web sites with "news" articles intended to influence opinion abroad and at home, but you have to look hard for the disclaimer: "Sponsored by the U.S. Department of Defense." The agencies spent a whopping $88 million spinning reality in 2004, splurging on P.R. contracts.
Even the Nixon White House didn't do anything this creepy. It's worse than hating the press. It's an attempt to reinvent it."
Dowd
"At last month's press conference, Jeff Gannon asked Mr. Bush how he could work with Democrats "who seem to have divorced themselves from reality." But Bush officials have divorced themselves from reality.
They flipped TV's in the West Wing and Air Force One to Fox News. They paid conservative columnists handsomely to promote administration programs. Federal agencies distributed packaged "news" video releases with faux anchors so local news outlets would run them. As CNN reported, the Pentagon produces Web sites with "news" articles intended to influence opinion abroad and at home, but you have to look hard for the disclaimer: "Sponsored by the U.S. Department of Defense." The agencies spent a whopping $88 million spinning reality in 2004, splurging on P.R. contracts.
Even the Nixon White House didn't do anything this creepy. It's worse than hating the press. It's an attempt to reinvent it."
Dowd
February 15, 2005
Rhymes with Guck
Much has been made of the Guckert/Gannon access to the White House briefings. The right is mad because the left has made a big deal of it. Those crazy bastards on the left are always making a big deal out of something, right? Of course, the left is mad because the White House planted a non-journalist from a phony news organization in the press room to ask really easy questions, like how was dinner with Jesus last night? (W and Jesus have a personal relationship, so I figure they must have dinner together.)
Fine. As usual we have our typical partisan fighting. But this time, the Democrats really are right (pardon the pun). The National Debate made a big deal out of the fact that some Dems were in a tizzy that Guckert used a pseudonym. Well, I would too if my name were Guckert. I’d have changed my name to Jeff Gannon in preschool if I were him. But even the craziest of Dems have not taken their eye off the big picture. Why was this guy in the press room? What the hell? Bush won the next four years and he sure is showing his true colors. He’s never liked the press because sometimes they ask him hard questions, like “what weapons of mass destruction?” Or they have the temerity to challenge him, like, “But, sir, there were no weapons of mass destruction.”
I’ll take Clinton and his cigar-stomping intern any day over a President who wants phony journalists planted in the white house to make sure he gets asked first date type of questions. Mr. President, if you want a fake journalist, hell, invite me to the press room. I’ve got some questions for you.
Fine. As usual we have our typical partisan fighting. But this time, the Democrats really are right (pardon the pun). The National Debate made a big deal out of the fact that some Dems were in a tizzy that Guckert used a pseudonym. Well, I would too if my name were Guckert. I’d have changed my name to Jeff Gannon in preschool if I were him. But even the craziest of Dems have not taken their eye off the big picture. Why was this guy in the press room? What the hell? Bush won the next four years and he sure is showing his true colors. He’s never liked the press because sometimes they ask him hard questions, like “what weapons of mass destruction?” Or they have the temerity to challenge him, like, “But, sir, there were no weapons of mass destruction.”
I’ll take Clinton and his cigar-stomping intern any day over a President who wants phony journalists planted in the white house to make sure he gets asked first date type of questions. Mr. President, if you want a fake journalist, hell, invite me to the press room. I’ve got some questions for you.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)