Please, please, please, please, please let Hillary Clinton be Secretary of State. I wanted her to be President, you denied me that. I wanted her to be VP, you denied me that. Is this one little thing asking too much? Imagine, Hillary, dining with foreign leaders, telling them, "Play ball or I will kick your ass!" And meaning it, and succeeding!
Please God, Obama, Bruce, SC or whomever, please. It's been a tough year for me. I moved into an overpriced LA apartment where sparks fly every time I plug in a lamp, and everyone in LA thinks I'm a horrible driver and honks at me. I'm another year older, another year without realizing my Big Dream(s) and for crying out loud, I'm so short. Give me this one thing. Just this one thing. I swear I'll stop cussing, I swear I'll give up French wine, I swear I will not put anything else on my charge card, I swear I'll be nicer to Republicans, I swear, I swear, I swear I will simply behave. Just let her be Secretary of State.
Oh, and if it is not too much trouble, can you perform a miracle on my closet? When I open the closet door, please let it be full of wonderful Prada that fits me.
Thanks a ton, err, Amen.
