A dear friend of mine had to put her cat to sleep this past weekend. Like most pet owners, she really, really loved her cat and spent thousands and thousands of dollars over the past year to pay for his medical treatments. I sent her flowers as a condolence, and I’ve been spending a lot of time with my own cat, letting him know how much I love him, and how superior I think he is to not only other cats, but to all my friends’ kids, as well. This may all seem really silly to someone who is not a pet lover, but out of all this, I had a strange thought: our pampered pets are winning the war on terrorism.
Americans (and other western countries) pamper their pets. We dress them in human clothes, buy them gourmet food, take out insurance on them, pamper them with peticures. In a way, it's the most definitive way we say to the terrorists, “screw you. This is the way we live our lives and all the hijackings, bombings and ululating you do isn’t going to stop that.”
So if you want to be a good American, give your charitable contributions to your nearest animal shelter. It will really piss the terrorists off.
And if you have pets, shower your attention on Fido or Miss Liza. Dress them up in your pet clothes. Let them eat at the table, off the plate. Feed them steak. Put Channel #5 on their fur. In a small way, you and your beloved animal are soldiers in the fight against terrorism. Added value: it will give the neighbors something to talk about.
