Walmart proved this week that it is, beyond a shadow of a doubt, truly without a lick of merit. It’s bad enough that it doesn't care about paying its employees a good wage. It doesn't care about sweatshop workers much less giving its employees decent healthcare. What does it care about? Not pissing off the religious right, evidently, the only people with bad enough taste to shop there.
What were Walmart's PR people thinking this week when they apologized to the insidious Catholic League of Religious and Civil Rights for leaving the word “Christmas” out of its sales promotion? There is a word for people like the Catholic League: Jackasses. So, Jackasses, listen up: our country was founded on the tenet that we could be free from people like you. Christmas isn’t about Jesus’s mythical birthday, it’s about me having a fight with my husband, telling him that “I know it’s the gift that counts but what in the f$$k were you thinking?” Anyway, if the Catholic League of Religious and Civil Rights were true to their name, they’d be pushing for gays to be married and for Walmart to throw large Ramadan sales.
Tis’ the season to remember the real spirit of Christmas: half-price sales on cashmere sweaters at Saks. Snobby salespeople at Neiman Marcus. Diet eggnog. And most importantly, uttering these sacred words: “Waiter, another glass of champagne, please.”
