I’ve had the misfortune of reading blogs where the blogger goes into detail about their physical ailments, like constipation, or oozing wounds. Not to be one of them, but I’ve had a nasty allergic reaction to shellfish, which resulted in a rash where the hives look like major GOP players. I think there is a god and I’m in trouble. Most disturbing was the welt that resembled Condi Rice but morphed into Kevin Spacey (who I think may be a Dem). Then there was the welt that resembled W inappropriately placed on my inner thigh. Dick Cheney’s doppelganger welt is very stubborn and insists on spreading up my side. I think that welt is out to kill me. These welts don’t react well to the steroids my doctor gave me. Just like a Republican, they have a get out my sandbox mentality. Unfortunately, none of my welts resemble my heroic senator, Harry Reid. He’s my new Jimmy Carter, except he can be really mean, which is great.
As a result of my illness, I haven’t been blogging like I should, but good lord, do I have some things to say. First off, Harry Reid is a hero. Let me rephrase: Harry Reid kicks ass. Is he too old to run for President. I like Hillary just fine, but Harry has balls of steel. This country needs him and to think, he’s my senator. I want him and my other favorite senator, Barbara Boxer, to marry and spawn litters of little hell-raising democrats.
Thank you, Harry, for drawing attention back to the crime at hand, the swampland in Iraq story that the W administration sold to this country. Rove is off his game. He thought that he could get the focus off Plamegate by having W announce that Sam Alito is his new nominee. And by the way, when that fails, haul out the Avian bird flu pandemic to get people riled up. Look, I’m a professional hypochondriac. At Christmas, my team of doctors send me cards saying, “thanks for putting my children through Harvard.” Even I’m not freaked about this bird flu thing, yet. When dead birds start showing up on my doorstep, I’ll do the logical thing and freak out, but in the meantime, what I really want to know is why do the leaders of our country think that personal retaliation is, what’s that word they like . . . oh yeah, Christian.
W, you screwed up again, little buddy. When you nominated Alito, you galvanized the Left who are pissed off that your people are hell bent on taking away our right to chose. W punkin’, there’s a word for you and your kind: evil. Immoral. Jackasses. Okay, that’s three words. SOBs. 4 words. Arrogant, self-righteous, hypocrites. I’m losing count.
