Yesterday, I had a visit with a psychic. Before you judge, just let me say, it’s not like I went to some back alley psychic, where in a few years illegal abortion clinics will move in next door after W has his way. A coworker’s mom happens to be a psychic, and she called work to speak to her daughter, and during the course of the conversation, asked to talk to me. She told me that my parents, who had “crossed over,” were with me often and were very happy with my life and proud of me. If this is true, it can only mean one thing. Even the dead hate W.
My parents were staunch Republicans. When they were alive, we’d get into huge fights over which party was actually the evil choice: Republicans or Democrats. My father, in particular, hated Democrats. Daddy was a southern racist. It really bugged him that blacks got the right to vote, and he blamed the dems for this, despite the fact that Lincoln had much more to do with it than anyone else. If George Wallace could have been president, Daddy would have been happy about that, wheelchair and all -- it worked for FDR, but then again, he was on the “dark side,” so bad analogy.
A few years before my father died, during Clinton’s administration, the federal government forced a reorganization of Mississippi’s voting precincts, so that blacks had a chance to elect a candidate of their choice, as opposed to Big Bubba’s choice. I love Clinton, but I think with that decision, he may have killed Daddy. When he died, I think he channeled his hatred of Democrats to Mama, who already hated Democrats enough. I think Clinton’s re-election did her in.
But now they are in heaven or that great big Republican Country Club in the sky, (the psychic said Mama has grown her hair long and Daddy is smoking cigars again), watching down on me and feeling proud that their baby daughter has a blog where she bashes W. It’s not just the dead that hate W. It’s the dead Republicans, too. Remember, in the afterlife, we’re supposed to be much smarter.
I asked the psychic to tell my parents that, finally, they realized I was right. She said, “they know.”
